Monday, April 21, 2008

DragonFUZE #11

What is it that they say about the light that burns twice as bright?

I'm struggling at the moment. I am working long hours. I want to spend as much time as possible with my baby boy. I want to be with my wife. I want to write and create comics, most specifically a creator-owned horror book that I am supposed to be working on at the moment.

It's fatal, but time is what I want...

I don't have enough of the stuff; time that is. I think that I fell in love with comic book story telling at completely the wrong time in my life. I just can't fit it in. I do seem to waste a lot of time on the computer, just aimlessly surfing for the next big thrill. When I sit down at my iMac with all intention to write (usually after 9:30 pm), I find I am too tired to crank out more than a page (at best) and then ... I am on the net checking for useless entertaining pap.

I also think that the fire in my belly is no longer there. Yes, I still want to be a published comic book writer. Yes, I still want my ideas and characters to get out there. Yes, I have the skill to write a decent story, but do I have the will and the commitment and the passion to actually do it?

I am not so sure anymore ...

Once upon a time storytelling and writing meant everything to me. But, now I am married, I have a son, I have a demanding job ... priorities change. Once I bought 15 comics each month. Now, I buy one (if it comes out on time), plus the odd TPB every few months. Once every spare minute of my life was consumed by creating storylines and characters, now it seems to be consumed by working and (more importantly and rewardingly) our boy.

Sorry for the negative post. I am just so tired and I am feeling like the opportunities to be creative are diminishing by the day.



Blogger Crazz said...

Well I guess that explains what happened to the boards. Hang in their Jason, it's going to get easier with the little guy. If I can be of any help, in any way, just drop me a line.

Wed Apr 23, 03:49:00 PM  
Blogger Cary said...

i too have to say hang in there sir. we all have lulls where we just don't feel like it anymore. but it will pass and you'll come out of it energized all the more for having the break. so don't let it get to you. hell, embrace it. watch some mindless TV for a change. :)

Wed Apr 23, 06:49:00 PM  
Blogger dragonfuze said...

I have just been asked to pitch for a horror anthology to be published by Arcana. So, we will see what happens.

Thu Apr 24, 11:03:00 AM  

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