DragonFUZE #26

Two months gone and no creative updates... The reason why is because there really isn't anything to say... Work and life keep me from pursuing much writing these days.

When I last checked in I was still waiting to hear back on my I Hate You pitch. Well, that pitch got knocked back, so all that will ever be is a script and a few rough layout pages.

Other work that I was doing that seems to be on perpetual hold are the horror stories Scratch and HellGrunt and the fantasy story Tikki's Giant. Of them all Scratch, the story of a nightmare gone horribly wrong, is the only one with a likelihood of being published in the near future. I have a possibly interested artist and a possibly interested publisher. What I don't have is a script! I am still haunted by the experience of writing my massacre/ suicide story I Hate You, so I am wary of delving into darkness again for Scratch.

The thing is though, if I never write it I will never know if I could conquer the fear that is holding me back. So, I have to surmount that block. Plus, I think it is a cool and unconventional horror tale, the potential publisher thinks so too. It's time for me to get fingers to keyboard on that one.

On a lighter note, I want to have more Tikki work published in 2009, so it's time to get off my butt on that too. I have two more Tikki stories that I want to do: Tikki's Giant and Tikki's Mirror. I want to get these stories done for two people; myself and my one year old boy, so that should be a good motivator!

Hopefully later this year, or early next year, I will have more updates for you. I really want these and other DragonFUZE Comics stories out there!

DragonFUZE #22

Here is the script that I recently submitted to an Ape Entertainment anthology project; the book's theme was revenge. I found out the other day that my story didn't make the cut; the publisher went for more traditional superhero-type stories.

I am really proud of I Hate You, this story is so far from the usual fare that I write. I feel as though I really pushed myself as a creator on this one; that's the real positive here. This story will probably never be published anywhere else but on this blog. I am placing it here for all to see as I feel it is one of the strongest pieces I have ever written.

Thanks to Brant and Cary for their edits on this script.

I HATE YOU

Page 1

1. The first panel shows a typical hallway of any American high school. The shot is straight down the middle of the hall, with lockers on each side and teenage kids walking up and down the hall; some kids should be together, others alone. They are all dressed in casual clothes, no school uniforms.

Caption: I Hate You …

2. We see a close up of pretty girls gathering around one girl’s locker. One of the girls is talking.

Girl: So, like, he put his hand…

Caption: I hate you Lisa White. With your perfect hair and your perfect nose and your perfect clothes and your perfect perfectness!

3. We see some boys walking down the corridor and they are laughing.

Boys: Ha! Ha!

Boy: Dude, she let me do it …

4. We see the boys vanishing into the distance of the corridor. There are some open doors with kids heading into classrooms. We see a girl from behind, she is stooping slightly. The girl is wearing a loose sweater, jeans and sneakers. She has long curly hair pulled together in a ponytail.

Caption: They all want one thing, the same thing.

Caption: I hate them.

Credits appear on this page.

Story/ Script: Jason

Page 2

1. We see a girl sitting on her bed, she is slightly turned from the camera, so we don’t clearly see her face, but it is the same girl from the last panel on Page 1. The girl has curly hair. She is dressed in a sweater and jeans. Her shoes are off. She has a laptop computer on her lap and is writing in her blog/ online journal. The captions could look like plain text.

Caption: I wonder if, like, the FBI is gonna read this?

2. We see the girl’s fingers on the keyboard.

Caption: …so that’s my plan. I know where to get it, and I know how to use it. Like, I’m not dumb!

Caption: If you’re reading and wondering … yes, I am crazy enough to do it.

3. We see the girl’s fingers on the keyboard.

Caption: Bang! You’re dead.

4. We see the girl’s fingers on the keyboard.

Caption: I’m sorry Mom, but I am going to pull the trigger.

Page 3

1. We see a girl’s hand holding a pistol (see http://www.gundirectory.com/more.asp?gid=20271&gun=Pistol).

These captions are not in plain text.

Caption: Cobra HP22. I bought it online - $150. That’s all I could afford.

Caption: It’ll do the job.

2. We see a shot of the inside of Kane Street Synagogue (see http://www.kanestreet.org/index.html). Do not name the synagogue in the story.

Caption: I hate when Mom drags me to synagogue.

3. We see a group of middle age women all chatting. Deborah is in the middle of the group, a woman is waving excitedly and her hand obscures Deborah’s face. Deborah is wearing a dress.

Caption: They are Brooklyn’s ‘whinest’ … I made up that word, but they really do whine. ‘

Caption: Kane Street kvetchers … I hate you.

4. We see the girl’s hand with the gun.

Caption: Imagine if I did it in the synagogue! Not a very good Jewish girl.

Page 4

1. A good-looking teen girl (she’s about 16) walks towards the camera. She is dressed casually and has long straight hair. She is smiling and waving.

These captions are not in plain text.

Caption: I hate you, Natalie. Your smile kills me.

Natalie: Hey Deb!

2. Natalie is running away from the camera. She is holding Deborah’s hand although Deborah is off panel. Natalie looks excited.

Natalie: Come on! They’re at the back of the baseball field. You have to see them … it’s totally gross!

3. Natalie and Deborah are running away from the camera, so we only see them from behind.

Caption: I hate how she lives life vicariously.

4. Natalie is running towards the camera, her face fills the panel. She is smiling.

Caption: She’s my best friend.

Caption: Can I pull the trigger?

Page 5

1. Mom and Dad are sitting at the dinner table, they are in their 40s; Dad is balding and wears a messy looking shirt and tie. Mom is wearing an apron over her dress. Steaming plates of food are on the table.

These captions are not in plain text.

Mom: Dinner!

Caption: I hate her cooking.

2. The dinner is over. Dad kisses Mom on the cheek, they are still seated at the table. We see Deborah from behind.

Caption: I hate public displays of affection.

Caption: Especially involving Mom and Dad. Gross!

Caption: It’s safer to eat in my room.

3. Mom and Dad kissing. Deborah is off panel.

Caption: No one wants to kiss me.

4. Mom is standing behind an ironing board and is holding up a neatly ironed business shirt. She is smiling.

Caption: Mom, look at what you have become.

Caption: I hate you.

5. Mom and Dad are framed in a box, as if they are being lined up in a gun’s target.

Caption: Dad, you’ll never understand me.

Caption: I hate you...

Page 6

1. A school party is being held at a house (see http://www.hep.man.ac.uk/u/kim/paloalto/bluehouse.jpg for reference). A group of teenagers is outside.

These captions are not in plain text.

Caption: I hate parties.

2. Deborah is walking towards the house, she looks slouched. She is wearing loose jeans and a sweater.

Caption: I don’t have a fake ID. I have no beer.

3. Natalie is standing at the top of the steps, waving at Deborah. We see Deborah from behind.

Caption: I’ve never been to Tina’s before. She’s too popular to be seen with me

Caption: I can’t believe Nat wants to be here. Why does she look so happy?

4. Deborah and Natalie are hugging in front of an open door.

Natalie: Hi!!

Caption: She isn’t drunk … yet.

Caption: I’m sure some guys will try to fix that.

5. A group of guys drinking cans of beer. We see them as though framed by a gun’s target.

Caption: I hate you.

Caption: Imagine if I pulled my Cobra right here!

Caption: That’d be messed up.

Page 7

1. We see Deborah from behind. She is holding Natalie’s hair away from her face. Natalie is hunched over, facing away from the camera. She is vomiting,

SFX: HHHUUURRRGGGHHH!!

These captions are not in plain text.

Caption: I hated them urging her on.

2. Close up, and side on, we see Natalie’s lips, bile is dripping from them.

Caption: The boys wanted her drunk.

3. In this panel, show Deborah’s hand clasping the gun.

Caption: If I had it with me, I’d make sure I never had to see their snickering faces again!

4. Close up on Natalie’s eyes, she is crying.

Caption: I haven’t got a choice now. I can’t take this anymore.

Page 8

1. We see Deborah sitting on her bed, she is slightly turned from the camera, so we don’t clearly see her. She has a laptop computer on her lap and is writing in her blog/ journal. The captions should look like plain text.

Caption: The party was the last straw. I know I have to do this.

2. Deborah is typing with one hand. The other hand clasps the pistol.

Caption: This blog is a record of all that I have seen; a catalogue of corruption, decay and insanity.

3. This box contains only text.

Caption: A monument to one lone girl’s stand against cancerous decadence.

4. This box contains only text.

Caption: A manifesto that lays my plans clear for all to see.

5. This box contains only text.

Caption: When they scrub the blood off the walls, they will know…

Page 9

1. We see Deborah sitting on her bed, she is facing the camera. We see her clearly for the first time. Deborah has freckles, a button nose, dark eyes. She has a laptop computer on her lap and is writing in her blog/ journal. The captions look like plain text.

Caption: … why I hate you.

2. We see Deborah, face on for the first time. She is crying and tears roll down her face.

Deborah: What have I become?

3. Close up on Deborah. This poem appears in text boxes around her face. The text boxes could look like plain text.

Caption:

My heart is like an Abyss
Deep. Cold. Empty.
Deep within, my soul screams
it echoes with unconscious fury
No-one hears, no-one cares

I peer over the edge and see
only nothing
There is no light or passion
I am barren

I have been stripped of all that is me
Now I am blank, I am nothing
Fury and self destruction is my life
It will bring the end and then
the Abyss will take me

Page 10

1. We see Deborah looking into a mirror. Her reflection is clear. She is crying, tears run down her cheeks.

These captions are not in plain text.

Deborah: No more blogs. No more lies.

2. We see Deborah looking into the mirror. She is holding the Cobra HP22.

Deborah: I am blank.

3. We see Deborah looking into the mirror. She is holding the Cobra HP22 to her temple.

Deborah: Grow up. The tears stop now.

Deborah: No more pity, no more envy.

4. We see Deborah looking into the mirror. She is holding the Cobra HP22 to her temple.

Deborah: Deborah; you did this!

5. The panel is black. The SFX and caption appears in white.

SFX: Blam!

Caption: I hate you.

DragonFUZE #20

I did hear back from the editor and it looks like time is not on my side... The good news is that the publisher is anticipating doing a follow up anthology later (probably in 2009) so I think we will aim for that. AAARRRGGGHHH!!! I am so frustrated by my own insanity in biting off more than I could chew. What's done is done, so I best just leave it at that. I know the publisher of a different horror magazine, so that route might be a back up...

Meanwhile, I still haven't heard anything about the I Hate You script, it's only been a few days since I sent it off, but passing time just eats away at me! I just want to know the outcome. I am so passionate about this story, I think it is the strongest piece I have written yet, and I am keen to see an artist tackle the script. If I don't make it in, I will see what other avenues I can pursue because I really want this story out there. I think people who know me will be surprised when they read it... so I am hoping that they get the chance.

At the moment I am feeling very unsure of the way forward creatively... More soon.

DragonFUZE #18

I finished the I Hate You script over the weekend. Completing this story required a huge effort as each and every letter typed, each page completed took me one step closer to the horrible conclusion; I felt as though I was dragging this story out of me.

So, I am partially relieved to have the story done. The story is now with my LCS editors Brant, Cary and Chuck. Thanks to Cary for his useful and perceptive feedback. I hope that Brant and Chuck can share some insights, but I know that they are both busy.

The deadline for the script is Thursday, but I am determined to get this to the editors by no later than the day before. I know the inclusion of my story was touch-and-go, so I am keen to get them the best script I can, as early as I can. I really want this story to come to fruition; this has been difficult to write, both emotionally and technically, so just in its completion I feel a sense of accomplishment.

DragonFUZE #17

I am half way through the I Hate You script. So far, it's good, not great, but good. This is only a first draft. I feel like you can take two things away from the story; either you feel the drama is building, or you feel Deborah is whining. I hope it's the first one.

Some scenes have been really painful. The one with Mom, Dad and Deborah at the table was tough; I can't tell you why, but it was. She's got a gun. This is twisted! Why am I writing this?

I hope it gets picked up.

I'm logging off.

DragonFUZE #16

I started writing the I Hate You script tonight. I have written a few pages, and the story is already freaking me out. Also, another thing that is getting to me is that I don't think I will make it in to the anthology. One of the editors wrote to me today to say there are three piles that they have divided the submissions into: Yes, No and Don't Know. I Hate You is in the Don't Know pile; they are not sure what to make of the story. They won't know until they see a script. I think I am the only writer to have a script in that pile; I am still in with a shot.

So, I am writing the script! I don't give up that easy. The script is getting to me, and I have only written two and a half pages. I am scared of this story. I told my wife about it and she hates it, she is repulsed by it and can't understand why I would write anything like this. I don't either. In the end, I think that's going to be my downfall.

Basically the editor told me there are a few stories with similar themes to I Hate You and only one will get through. I could go about this two ways. I could sanitize the story to make it more palatable, but that's not me. This anthology is about revenge, so this won't be pretty. I am going to push myself as hard as I can. I want to be uncomfortable when I write this (which I am) and I want the artist, the inker, the letterer, the editor and the reader to feel the same way.

Of course I want the story to be picked up. But, I also want to be proud of the story. I want to push myself as a writer. There's no easy way out on this one.

It's 11 pm. I'm off to sleep.

DragonFUZE #14

I sent off the full I Hate You pitch to the anthology editor tonight. I feel really good about this story. This is the first time in the 11 years that I have been working towards writing comics (I can't believe it has been that long) that I feel as though I am really pushing myself into new territory. I Hate You is fictional, but not fantastic fiction; there are no dragons or robots, there is no magic or enhanced technology, there is no genetic mutations or super powers in this story. I Hate You is raw and it is real and it is solid, dark and painful human emotion.

I feel quite liberated by this story, despite its intense melancholy and stark violence. I don't feel that I prove anything by writing about mythical demons, but when I write about a girl and her tangible, personal demons; that resonates with me. Without going into details here, I have been to some dark places in my life and I have stared death in the face too many times. I understand Deborah (the story's main character) and the emotions that consume her because, while the way I acted is very different to the steps Deborah takes in this story, I have been to that terrible place.

Much of my writing is dark, melancholic and, even, depressive. Whatever a writer writes comes from within. I may not be thrilled that this stain is still there on my soul during what will be the happiest years of my life, but the fact is that there is no wonder product that can wash this mark out of my heart.

Writing can help though. As with HellGrunt I am somewhat disturbed by where I Hate You is taking me, but I am inspired by the opportunity to take this journey.

DragonFUZE #13

I hate you - that's the title of my pitch to the Revenge anthology at Ape Entertainment. I just came up with the idea a few minutes ago and fired an email off to the editor.

I'll let you know how it goes.

Two posts in one day - WOO HOO!